199lbs
My name is Henry Glaucher. I am 30 years old and in great shape. Alright, maybe I’m a little out of shape from what I used to be but it’s not a big deal. I used to be the star linebacker on my high school football team. 200lbs might not sound like a lot but when you’re 5’9” all muscle, it packs quite a punch, let me tell you. Life was great back then, I worked like a horse, and ate like a dog. Ever since getting this desk job 2 years ago, I’ve been working more like a lazy hippo. Surfacing only to get food and drink. I still eat though, so I know I have good nutrients getting into my body. I should get rid of this extra flab though, I’ve been thinking about getting a membership at the gym, that’ll work.
301lbs
Eating: the consumption of food; which through biological processes your body breaks down and turns into the energy which is necessary to live. The more one eats the better they should live. Look at the kings of old, praised for the amount of food they could devour. Eating to the point of obesity has even influenced fashion styles. The reason that men do not button the bottom button on a sport coat is because when King Edward VII was too fat to button his bottom button, everyone else stopped too and it is still the style today 100 years later. So eating isn’t really so bad. I just can’t help it. It’s not even that everything tastes so good, it is just the feeling of eating makes me so happy. Plus I’m not that fat, there are plenty of people bigger than I am.
411lbs
Ok, so I’ve gained a little weight. Proportionately, it’s not that much; just one third more than before. Eating is my favorite thing to do, and why not, there are so many varieties of foods. It has been a small problem though since I got fired from my job. My boss actually told me it was unprofessional to have food delivered to the office. No one else gets in trouble for having food delivered, but apparently having it delivered three times a day “is just unacceptable.” What a jerk, oh well, I just find another job soon. In the mean time I got this really nice severance plan, so I should have plenty of money before I find a new job. On top of that ever since my nagging wife left me, I’ve got this whole place to myself. I think I’ll buy a treadmill and put it in what used to her office, it’ll be better than that gym membership I never use. You know I went a couple times, but people kept looking at me like some idiot who didn’t know what he was doing, don’t they know I still hold the record for number of 300lb reps at the high school?
547lbs
Man, that whole treadmill thing turned out to be a huge bust. I can’t afford those prices, especially when no one will fucking hire me. I have bills to pay and groceries to buy. I went to a financial advisor the other day, what a jerk off. He told me that my groceries bills were of an unusually large percentage of my monthly expenses. I was like, “look, I may eat more than average person, but come on it’s not that excessive. I get hungry so I eat. Yesterday I ate a box of doughnuts, two bowls of cereal, and some eggs and bacon for breakfast. I ate some jerky, chips and Cheetos before lunch because I wanted a snack. I went to that restaurant down the street for lunch, and had bread, soup, salad, ribs, potatoes, corn, and vegetables. Of course I also had some of that great cheesecake they serve. I took an extra piece home for later, but I ate it on the way home. Later that afternoon I made myself a couple of sandwiches and then had a frozen pizza with it. I nibbled on a pint or two of Ben and Jerry’s later. For dinner I had those two fried chickens that they sell precooked at the store, a small box of pasta-roni, another frozen pizza, and more ice cream for dessert.” The man looked at me in disbelief, but I’m pretty sure he understood why my grocery expenses were a little above normal.
752lbs
Ever since my legs started to bother me I haven’t really left my condo. Yeah, it’s a condo, I couldn’t afford my house anymore so I moved into a condo. My sister called me the other day to tell me that my nephew Jeff is in the newspaper for his work at the soup kitchen. I don’t get the paper, so I figured I’d look at my neighbor’s paper, but when I tried to leave, I couldn’t fit through the door. I didn’t even realize it had been three months since I was last outside. All of my food is delivered to me from this website which makes it easier because of my legs. Stupid legs, if it wasn’t for them I could exercise and loose this weight.
889lbs
I hate my life. No one visits me anymore, and all I do is eat, maybe I should really loose this weight and get my life back in order. Oh that’s right I can’t. I went into cardiac arrest yesterday and died. It’s a good the thing the guy from the website came to deliver my groceries; otherwise I don’t think anyone would have found me. It took six firemen to move my body out of the house, and they had to remove my door frame and cut a bigger hole in the wall to fit my body through. If only I could take it back now.
